Ramblings from a Hoodlum Pastor

Lessons From a Funeral

This past Tuesday, I attended the funeral of Gabe Brewer, the 17 year old son of Chris & Judy Brewer.  Chris is one of my good pastor buddies that I've shared many gut busting laughs a few tears with over the years. 

I'm usually on the other side during funerals trying to point people to the hope we have in Christ, but this time I was sitting in the crowd praying for my friend as he did an amazing job both talking about & modeling an amazing faith in Jesus.  I've got to be honest, I advised Chris to let someone else do this.  He didn't have to be strong for anyone on this day; he simply needed to be a grieving dad.  But, Chris said he had always taught Gabe that leaders lead & they never avoid hard things.  So, he stepped up to the plate & knocked it out of the park.

One thing that sticks in my mind from the service was the strength of Chris's relationship with his son.  He read a card Gabe gave him a few weeks ago in which Gabe told Chris he was his best friend.  Gabe had also told Chris that he was his hero.  Chris said, in reality, Gabe was his hero because of the strength of his life at such a young age that Chris didn't have until much later in life. 

I truly believe this is  the heart beat of every father & son.  Every son wants his dad to be his best friend & hero & every dad wants to be his son's hero.  I know because I am both a son & a dad.  Since Tuesday, I've thought a lot about this & wondered how I'm doing with my sons & I hope it challenges you to do the same.  My primary job is to pastor & disciple my wife & kids before I pastor & disciple my church.  That's the primary responsibility of every dad.  So, dads, don't forget to hug your kids & tell them how much they mean to you, no matter how old they're getting or how much bigger than you they may be.  A son never reaches an age that he doesn't want to be blessed by his dad. 

Thanks, Chris, for the reminder & thanks for not backing away from tough stuff.     

Good Life Lessons from a Bad Football Game

I hope everyone had a great Labor day weekend.  It was great to watch college football...until last night, that is.  That's when Tennessee got beat by a UCLA team with the talent of a good Junior College team at best.  Last night's game was a great picture of what a really good coach (Neuheisel) can do with horrible talent & what a really outdated & conservative coach (Fulmer) can do with amazing talent.  I've got a feeling it's going to be a long year.  I'm sure Alabama, Florida, Georgia & even Vandy had a smile on their face as they watched the debacle on TV.   

I've always said you can learn some really good life lessons from the great game of football.  Here are a couple of things I believe we can learn from last night's game.

Play to your strengths -  Our QB may end up being the best single season passer in UT history, but last night he wasn't.  He consistently overthrew & under threw wide open receivers.  He held the ball waaaaay too long & took a sack that took his team out of field goal range.  At the same time, we were running it with ease on the perimeter.  So, why why keep throwing when you can grind the clock & increase your chances of scoring by running more than throwing on a night when you're QB obviously can't throw it in the ocean?  PLAY TO YOUR STRENGTHS!

This is true for any area of life.  We need to know what we're good at & do it & pull other's around us who can do what we're not good at.  The old adage "Know Thyself" is a really good & applicable term if we really want to succeed at whatever it is we do.  We must know our strengths & weakness & play to our strengths.  And, we must be smart enough to realize when we're having a bad day & be flexible enough to improvise. 

Be willing to take risks  -  Last night, when UCLA got the ball back with less than two minutes to play, I knew exactly what our defensive Guru (not) would do.  His team was playing a really bad offensive team.  Their number one running back & tight end went down early.  They started the game with their number 3 QB.  It was obvious, early in the game, that the smallest amount of pressure caused the QB to make erratic throws leading to four interceptions.  S0, what do you do, PRESSURE HIM WITH 5-6 PEOPLE ALL NIGHT, EVERY PLAY.  What did we do when the chips were on the table in the last two drives?  We stopped the pressure & played it safe.  It's called a prevent defense & all it does is prevent you from winning.  The announcers couldn't believe how good the bad QB had gotten all of the sudden.  Come on, even they knew he hadn't changed what he was doing; we had changed what we were doing. 

I tell all new staff members they must be willing to take risks.  We don't want to come to the end of the game & kick ourselves for playing it safe & missing opportunities to do great things for the kingdom.  Sometimes, we'll get burned.  We want always make the right call.  But, I'd rather know I got beat doing everything I can to win instead of trying not to lose.  There are times to play it safe & times to lay it on the line.  But, if you play it safe out of fear of losing, you're usually going to regret it.

These are just a few life lessons we can learn from this great game.  There'll probably be many more throughout this loooooong season.

 

I Love Board Meetings! I Really do.

I never thought I'd say those words.  Dr. Ken Hubbard, my mentor & predecessor, used to say that he had pastor friends who measured the days until retirement by the number of deacons meetings they had remaining (not because they loved them so much).   

Most churches operate under a governance modeled after the democratic form found in the good ole' US of A.  They hold a popularity contest spiritually disguised as a deacon election.  The reason I say it's a popularity contest is because, in many cases, even though they usually list the qualification straight out of the book of 1 Timothy, the only qualification they really care about is if the candidate has ever been divorced.  This comes from the statement in 1 Timothy 3:12 that the deacon should be the husband of one wife.  But, it's interesting that it doesn't say divorce; it says husband of one wife.  Does this mean never been divorced or to literally have only one wife?  It's debatable & maybe another post for another day.

Anyway, many churches are led by the most popular men in the church or those who have the most family members or friends rather than those who are the most spiritually mature.  They may not tithe or have a passion for evangelism or God's glory, but they're put in a position of making decision for the church.  This creates a situation that pits people who are passionate for God's glory against people who are passionate for themselves & their own interests & agenda.  As a result, most of the things churches argue & stall over don't really matter.

I'm writing this today because I came out of a meeting last night with our Board of Directors absolutely amazed & grateful that First Baptist Smyrna is governed by a system that places spiritual people in places of spiritual leadership.  In order to be on our board, a person has to be nominated & then fill out an application in which they have to speak of their spiritual walk & disciplines.  They have to believe & support the spiritual vision & DNA of the church.  They have to be involved in a small group & an area of service.  They have prove the tithe.  In other words, they have to prove they're spiritual leaders because we want spiritual leaders in places of spiritual leadership making spiritual decisions. 

As a result, since we've instituted this form of governance, I never come out of a meeting frustrated because people are more concerned with themselves than God.  I've come out of some meetings where I made a presentation & the committee or Board didn't think it was the right way to go, but, rather than leaving frustrated, I left encouraged & inspired to partner with some of the most amazing, spiritual leaders who have no agenda other than God's glory. 

Thank you leaders of FBC, Smyrna.  I'm encouraged by your spiritual maturity.  I amazed at your selflessness.  I'm thankful for your friendship.  I'm inspired by your wisdom.  I'm grateful to be your pastor.

   

The three C's

When we're interviewing potential staff I always run them through what we call the three C grid.  The three C's are Character, Chemistry & Competency, in that order.  I believe these qualities are essential for the success of any team in any context.   

Character is the most important quality because you can't teach character; you've either got it or you don't.  And, if you don't have it, you're like the Titanic, you might sail for a while but, eventually, you're going down and taking a lot of people with you. 

Chemistry is next because, most days, we spend more time with each other than we do with our families.  So, it's pretty important that we get along better than Pacman & nightclub bouncer.  Also, we usually work in a lot of high stress stuff..eternal stuff.  So, we must be able to trust each other & be willing to carry each other's load.

Competency is last.  Now, competency is super important, but we can teach you to be a better pastor.  You can't teach character & you can't manufacture chemistry but you can teach leadership skills...to most people.

I say all this to give props to my staff...THEY"RE THE BEST.  I wouldn't trade any of them for anything.  We have 14 ministerial staff on our team...I think...and I really have no clue how many Ministry Assistants.  It's unusual for any team of that size to hit on all cylinders.  There's usually one or two weak links that keep a team from going full throttle. But, I thank God for the team He has assembled at FBC, Smyrna.  They are men & women of incredible character.   We have an amazing chemistry & they're competency is growing at lightening speed.  I'm so grateful for my team and the joy they make my job.  I hope I add as much value to their lives as they add to mine.. .